| Sep. 3rd, 2006 @ 01:56 pm Hypnosis for fun and profit |
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Last night there was a hypnotist at the college doing a show. I went with a bunch of my friends. What followed was...interesting.
my friend Bre, who's also one of the RAs for my residence hall ("Dorm" is a dirty word around here, for reasons I cannot fathom), actually got to go up and be hypnotized...
at one point, the hypnotist told the hypnotees (of which there were eight altogether) that the audience was made up of movie stars, rock stars, and sports stars, and that they should go out and find their favorites and bring them up on stage. Bre grabbed Tom, convinced he was Johnny Depp. This other girl grabbed me, thinking I was Derek Jeter.
The hypnotist, an Indian guy going by the name "Dr. Bengali", then went from hypnotee to hypnotee, asking them who their celebrity was, and carrying on a little dialogue about the celebrity. He got to Bre...
"Who is this?"
"Johnny Depp!"
"Ohhhhh! Johnny Depp! Anything you want to say to Johnny Depp?"
"You look really hot in eyeliner."
"Listen! Johnny Depp wants you to be in the next Pirates movie. You want to do it?"
"YES!"
"Johnny Depp says there's going to be a nude scene with your character and his. Is this okay?"
"Of course!"
"How much money do you want for the part?"
"No money, I just want to be with Johnny Depp!"
"Johnny Depp says his wife is very jealous, you'll have to be on guard for the rest of your life if you do this."
"Bring it bitch, I'm not afraid of her!"
Then her put her back to sleep and moved on to the girl who'd picked me, but it was a much shorter conversation...
"Who is this?"
"Derek Jeter."
"Derek Jeter doesn't want to marry you, but he wants to make love to you all day and night. Is this okay?"
"YES! Oh, YES!"
Then he put her back to sleep.
Later in the show, he had the hypnotees dancing, as part of an audition for a movie about strippers/chippendale dancers. BRE. WAS. SMOKIN'. Holy crap, she did the boob-shimmy, and the booty-dance, and the hypnotist put a chair in front of her and first she danced on top of it and then she got down and dry-humped it. But she didn't come across as slutty, she came across as really classy through the whole thing, if that makes any sense.
He wakes them up at the end of the show, none of them have any recollection of what they did, and Bre was a little mortified by our tales of her dancing...
after the show, there was a small contest to win some junk, and Tom won a couple Pirates of the Caribbean posters...he gave them to Bre, and offered to autograph them as Johnny Depp.
Earlier I went down to Bre's room to see if she was remembering anything or feeling any better about it, and she was a little, on both counts. So we sat around and chatted for like an hour about everything under the sun, mostly our respective high school, and especially prom, experiences. I briefly went back to my room and got my Tiki (a souvenir from Maui, a few years back) so I could tell her the story of Tiffany and Hawaiian Day 2005...
I've told everyone that story, right?
For those who haven't heard it...
The Tiki is about 9-10 inches tall, and 3-4 inches wide, and pretty phallic in appearance, in all honesty. I carried it around because it was Hawaiian Day as part of our school spirit/homecoming week. I carry it into math class, and Tiffany (a stupid, slutty, actually-pretty-unattractive cheerleader) saw it and said, "Bill, what is that?" and, just messing with her, I tell her, "Oh, it's a sex toy, Tiffany." SHE BELIEVED ME. And was disturbingly interested in it, so I actually had to tell her, no, it's not actually a sex toy, it's a piece of art carved from a block of wood.
Tiffany was something else.
So Bre hears this story, and handles the Tiki, and just develops this look of shock and horror on her face...
But we love Bre though. She's such a sweetheart, always looking out for everyone. |
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